GUEST POST: My Sister-in-Law, Nicole! [30/31]

Readers, you are in for a treat!! I am SO excited to be sharing this post from my sister-in-law, Nicole! Not only is she a beginner stay-at-home-mama, she's a new mama to boot! Nicole & her husband, Scott, are adjusting to their new life as parents while in the process of renovating an adorable, old home in Minneapolis, MN. She's done some blogging in the past, but maybe if we send her enough love, she'll get back into it! Until then, you can find her on Twitter or Instagam.

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I'm very excited to have the opportunity to do a guest post on Erin's blog! She's done such a great job giving us glimpses into her everyday SAHM world. I'm quite new to the SAHM life and feel like I know almost nothing yet. My daily companion is my 7-week-old son, Peregrin. As my husband and I started discussing parenthood several years ago, we both felt that me being home with our children was the right choice for our family. Now here I am!

Nicole's husband, Scott, & Peregrin. 

One of the biggest lessons I've learned so far as a SAHM is that balancing caring for my child and getting anything done is hard. Obvious, I know, but this reality is still rocking my world. Last week I cooked a meal for the first time since Peregrin was born. That's right. It took me SIX WEEKS to pull off cooking a full meal. Clearly I have a lot to learn. Daily I wonder how other moms run their households, how they balance caring for their children with their many other responsibilities. I cooked for the second time last night. In fact, I made both dinner and a crockpot breakfast that we'll be able to eat in the mornings all week. I did not, however, have the time or energy to clean-up after myself and went to bed with my kitchen looking like this:

                                                   

This piece was created for me by one of my aunts 34 years ago when I was a baby. It's now hanging on my son's bedroom wall and it's a daily reminder of what's really important during this season of life. I could put any number of things in place of "cleaning and scrubbing". Cooking, watching my favorite shows, decorating our new (old) house. These are all fine things, some are necessary, but I don't want to take this moment in time for granted. I'm stunned at how much my son has changed in just seven weeks, how much more in seven months! So I eat whatever is easy, ignore my bare walls and play with my tiny son. 

Of course things do need to get done at home and this is where I need some serious refining. I'm realizing that being organized and having a plan isn't just good, it's vital. Gone are the days where I could pour over recipes to find something new, make a list, go to the store for just that one meal's ingredients and then spend hours cooking. Gone too are the days where keeping on top of our family's finances could happen whenever and as often as needed. Of course, finding time to sit and draft a working schedule for my life isn't easy either so it's going to be a process. In the mean time I'll have to live with more crazy than I'm comfortable with but by God's good grace we'll manage to eat something and the bills will get paid on time, even if just barely.

                                      "What may be done at any time will be done at no time."

True. Being a SAHM is my new job and I desire to do it well, to take it as seriously as the work I did outside the home. I no longer have a boss potentially looking over my shoulder and my deadlines are more loose, if they exist at all. But I believe this is the most important work of my life and it's up to me to provide my own structure so that I can thrive in this roll. Right now Peregrin rises early (6 a.m.!), too early for me to rise before him, but I hope that over time this will change. Everyday I realize how incapable I am of handling all this on my own. I hope to rise before my son and spend time with the Lord at the start of each day. I need His strength and wisdom. I need Him to pour into me so I have anything at all to offer my family. On the lonely days I need to be reminded that He is with me.

Every day is its own adventure right now and mostly I feel like I'm flying by the seat of my pants. Years from now I hope to be able to look back on these days and see them as the beginning of a journey of maturation, of coming into my own as a wife and mother. As for tonight, dinner consisted of nachos and ice cream. But hey, I spent the evening playing with my son and I whipped that kitchen into shape so I'm still going to call it a win. 

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I’m linking up with The Nester every day in October for #31Days. You can find a list of all 31 posts as they are published by clicking here.

GUEST POST: Jessica from For the Love of Justice [28/31].

You guys. I am SO excited for day's guest post!! Jessica writes at For the Love of Justice, a blog about intentional living & everyday justice. She's a little bit more of a seasoned SAHM than I am & has so beautifully captured a day in the life of their family. Her kiddos are ADORABLE and it looks like the 3rd one will be making his arrival sometime TODAY! Be sure to check out her blog & fair trade database when you get a chance:)

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Hi there!  I’m Jessica and I am so excited Erin allowed me to share a little bit of my SAHM life with you!  I have two kids – Laura who is four and Titus who is almost two.  I am also about two weeks away from the birth of our third child, another little boy.  Life is definitely crazy around here!

I began my SAHM journey with the birth of our daughter.  Growing up I always knew I wanted to be a mom, dreamed about it, really.  Before Laura was born my husband and I decided I would stay home with her and I’ve never regretted that decision.  While some days are complete chaos (as Erin so honestly describes!), other days are so beautiful, I feel like I have the greatest job in the world.  

The best way to describe my life is to show you.  I loved the idea of taking a photo an hour for one day so here is a little peak into our lives:

7:00 – Titus wakes up and starts calling for me.  By the time I go to get him Laura is coming down the stairs.  I would love to say that our early mornings are wonderful but that is simply not the case.  I need space and silence to fully wake up but the kids don’t understand that concept yet!  I don’t know if it’s just me or what but they are always ridiculously loud in the mornings.  I make breakfast while reminding them over and over that, “It’s too early to be this loud.  PLEASE be quiet!”

8:00 – By eight things are usually looking a lot better.  I’ve had coffee.  The kids are fed and Laura is out of her pajamas.  There is a load of laundry in the washer.   Today the kids are content to play together without arguing so I slip out on to our front porch and drink in the cool crisp air.  This wakes me up more than anything else.  We moved to Idaho from Alabama about a year ago and my favorite part is still SEASONS.  Especially fall.  The leaves are beautiful right now.  

The kids are still playing together (miracle!) so I take a minute to read my Bible.  I have been slowly reading through Psalms and highlighting every place where “steadfast love” is used.  It’s in there A LOT.  I love it.  God’s steadfast love: immoveable, constant, unwavering.  I need a reminder of that daily.

9:00 – My husband is awake (today is his off day, yah!!) and entertaining Titus.  Laura is engrossed with coloring so I jump in the shower.  By the time I am out the TV is on, something that happens for an hour or so every morning around here.   

10:00 -   I convince Laura to come outside to play while I rake leaves.  Titus has a complete meltdown because the TV is off and he doesn’t want to go outside.  Or be held.  Or play with toys.  He wants to wander around the house and yell/cry.  Great.  He eventually gets over it and joins his sister in playing in the dirt.  It’s their favorite outdoor activity.

11:00 – I make a quick lunch, which is really breakfast – eggs, fruit and hash browns.  We are a breakfast loving family and can eat it for any meal of the day.  Oh, and trucks and trains are never far from the hands of my kids, even at the table.

12:00 – Titus goes down for an early nap because we have a mid-afternoon doctor appointment.  Laura heads to her room to rest and play quietly (sorta).  While the kids are in their rooms my husband and I catch up on the latest episodes of New Girl and our new favorite, Brooklyn Nine-Nine.  I am unusually tired today (thank you, nine month baby) so it feels good just to lie on the couch and relax.

1:00 – Laura’s rest time is almost over.  She usually watches a show while I finish up the projects I was working on during her rest (like blogging) but today I go up and spend time with her instead.  We read and tuck her favorite puppies into bed.  This photo-an-hour deal is making me pause and see things a little differently.  I probably should spend more time with just Laura instead of trying to get so much work done.  It’s a balance I think I will struggle with all of motherhood.

2:00 – We are on our way to the pediatrician to get Titus’ staph infection/diaper rash checked out AGAIN.  This thing never goes away.

3:00 – The kids love watching the fish in the waiting room.  Titus couldn’t stop stringing together long lines of excited gibberish.  Thankfully, our pediatrician confirms  what I think, the rash appears to be healing and this will hopefully be our last visit for a while.  Yah!

4:00 – While we are out, we swing by the mall to get my phone contacts and such switched to my husband’s old phone.  My phone had a tragic accident with the sidewalk earlier this week and has a spider web of cracks to prove it.  We pick up dinner at the food court and wander around a few stores before hitting up one of our favorite parks on the way home.

5:00 to 6:00 – We spend a while walking around the park.  It’s basically a huge, beautiful wooded area with sidewalks and a pond.  Last winter we saw three deer.  In the spring we saw geese with their fuzzy babies.  It’s a cool place and also, we discovered, THE place to take family photos. We counted no less than ten families getting their Christmas pictures taken, plus two weddings.  

7:00 – We finally get home and the kids watch a little TV before bed.  Bed time is often one of the hardest parts of the day for me, not going to lie.  Everyone is tired and cranky, the kids are both going through a stage where they hate baths…fun times!   My husband works the evening shift so bedtimes are usually my gig but since he is off I get some extra help.  Tonight I put Laura to bed while my husband wrangles Titus.  

8:00 onward – After the kids are in bed I get some quick blog stuff taken care of and then start on my big project : coming up with meal ideas and making a grocery list for my shopping trip tomorrow.  Sometimes I enjoy this job but lately I haven’t been into cooking AT ALL.  By the time I am done planning, browsing Pinterest and chatting with my husband, it’s almost 11 and I am ready for bed.  I check on Titus one more time to make sure he actually fell asleep in his bed (a feat that has only happened a handful of times since we moved him to his toddler bed a month or two ago).  He actually made it into bed tonight and I take a minute to watch him sleep before I go to bed myself.  It’s so peaceful.  

I can hardly believe I’ve been at this mothering thing for over four years.  Sometimes I feel like I am a fresh-faced newbie who knows nothing.  Every stage has its own unique challenges.  One of the most important things I have learned is to take the time to find out what really works for you.  There can be a lot of pressure to be some kind of perfect mom or to do things a certain way but everyone has different ways of dealing with motherhood and running a home.  One way is not better than the other.  Find a routine, a method, a way of doing things that makes things easy for you.  Just like at a typical workplace job, if you don’t love what you do, work becomes a chore and something you dread.  Being a SAHM mom is the same way.  If it’s not working, if it’s more frustrating than fulfilling, something needs to change.  Maybe it means you create a routine, you re-think how you are doing laundry, you ask for outside help, you intentionally take “time off” to be by yourself.  Make it work.  Love what you do.  When we find our sweet spot (which may be different with each changing season), it shows.  We become a better parent, a better wife, a better homemaker.

Well, that’s all I have…thanks for letting me share a bit about my life with you!  As a side note, you can find me at ForTheLoveOfJustice.com – a space I created to talk about my journey in living intentionally and practicing everyday justice.

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I’m linking up with The Nester every day in October for #31Days. You can find a list of all 31 posts as they are published by clicking here.